Ramblings
by nt'kit
Summary: How could a normal day turn into such a disaster? Ah right, Luffy got bored… Luffy's ramblings about a normal day with his crew! Ch.1, When you're playing Tag, remember to use protection.


Good day my wonderful readers! Yep, I know I should be writing my other stories, and I'm almost done with next chapter of Dream Island. I'm being a responsible author :')

Anyways, I really wanted to try and do a fic in Luffy's POV, resulting in this fic and me hoping that I made Luffy the most in-character for me possible. This is my first POV story, so I hope you like it!

Warning: Cursing, un beta'ed (if you find any mistake that really bothers you please let me know)

I don't own One Piece.

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Luffy's POV

Today is such a nice day, the birds are chirping, the sun is shining, there's enough wind to move the Sunny through the sea… There is just one problem.

I'm bored.

Bored in every sense of the word. It's been five days since we disembarked, looking for the next island, which name I can't remember, I think it sounded like food… I'm hungry… anyways, the past five days there's been nothing to do! Not even sea kings would come! It's as if they all agreed to stay away from the Sunny and enjoy our boredom. Stupid sea kings…

"Nami!" I whined, seriously, I needed an adventure now. "How long before we reach the islaaaand?" I saw her left eyebrow twitch; maybe whining was not the best of options I could use… Maybe if I asked like Sanji would? I should practice my spinning.

"For the tenth time this day, I don't know Luffy! Go and bother someone else!"

I pouted as she left me alone in the deck, why was she so cranky? Maybe she was in her period… no wait, that would be in two weeks.

Yes I know when her period starts; no, you don't want to know how. Though it's really convenient, because that way I know when I should stay away from monster Nami.

Heh, monster Nami.

Not that she knew, but that was my new nickname for her, I came with it a week ago when I had this really weird dream. I was on the Sunny, but there was no one around, and I was really hungry, and to my dismay Sanji had this super complicated lock, courtesy of Usopp, placed on the fridge. Hence, I couldn't eat, which left me with only one option.

Nami's orange tree.

Now, I know that I'm supposed to stay away from it and blah blah blah, but I was starving! And I didn't even know that you could starve on a dream! So I decided to be a ninja for the moment and get an orange from that tree. I hid, ducked some flaming shuriken, avoided some exploding kunai and fought ten ninjas before I could reach my destination. Oh, and by the way, I might be exaggerating just a bit. So when I finally grabbed an orange, I realized I couldn't take it out! I tried once more but the damn orange was stuck.

Then I felt it, someone was staring at me, no wait, scratch that, someone was killing me with their eyes, and when I turned around there was Nami, fuming at my little stealing act. I smiled sheepishly, but nothing would ever compare to what came next, hell even I was surprised! Nami _transformed_! Into this cool, huge monster! It was like a giant dinosaur with robot arms and Nami's head. I was so immerse with its coolness that I barely noticed that Namisaur breathed fire in my direction, and _that_ was awesome. But before that flame could hit me, someone came and saved me, and when I turned to see who it was, I saw Ace. He then proceeded to burn Namisaur to a crisp with his powers.

Ace is so cool… I love Ace, he's like, the coolest big brother of all! And he always saves me when I'm in trouble! I remember once, when we still lived with Dadan, that we sneaked to her room when she was gone and started to look for her underwear. HER PANTIES WERE HUGE! Ace and I fitted each in one leg! And I'm pretty sure that if both of us tried to fit in only one hole, we would've made it.

After fooling around for a bit (I was panty-man and Ace was bra-man) Ace had one of his narcolepsy's fit, so that left me alone with some huge panties. Then I, all of a sudden, decided to give Dadan a gift. I know she might be an ogre sometimes, but I was still grateful that she took care of us; and what better way to show someone your appreciation than with a gift, right?

I went to get my scissors in a hurry and returned to Dadan's room. Ace was still asleep.

I took Dadan's panties and started to cut them, I couldn't afford to buy her something, so I decided to create her something instead: a thong.

After 15 minutes or so I was done, the oh-so-huge panty was now a sexy thong made by me, and I must admit it was really good! If it wasn't for the fact that I really wanted to become the Pirate King, I would've seriously become a fashion designer.

Proud at my work, I tried to wake up Ace with no avail; that is until I heard the front door open and some grumblings from Dadan. A smile made its way to my face as I ran to the kitchen, where she would most likely be.

"Dadan!" I yelled in excitement, getting the older woman's attention.

"What is it, brat?" She asked, I know that even though she said the word brat, she loves me.

I felt how my smile grew larger and larger, and she noticed that I had something hidden behind my back. "I got you a present!" I said and in less than a second, I had her home made thong in front of me.

She stood silent for a moment, she wasn't even moving! Even though she denies it, I know she was shocked because of all the excitement.

"Y-Yo-You…" She stuttered. Aw, she's so excited she can't even talk! "I-I-I…" Okay, but hurry up! This is getting tiring, this thong's quite heavy you know?

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU STUPID BRAT!"

Alright, that was _not _the answer I was expecting.

I threw the thong to the side and started to run like a maniac as an angry Dadan chased me through the house.

I'm guessing she didn't like my present.

All of a sudden, the stupid thong got in my way and I tripped. I tried to get up as fast as I could, but then I saw this huge shadow lurking over me.

I started to sweat. This was it. Bye-bye to my dream of becoming the Pirate King, or a fashion designer. I closed my eyes, ready for a hit that never came.

Huh?

When I opened my eyes there was Ace, standing in front of me with his arms open, as if protecting me from whichever evil force (Dadan) that dared to attack me.

"Don't you dare lay a finger on Luffy" Ace said with a growl, successfully calming Dadan a bit. "Are you hurt?" He asked me before helping me up. I shook my head and then grabbed the lone thong that was still on the ground. "What did you do to anger her so much?"

I gave Ace my special grin confusing him for a bit. "I decided to give Dadan a gift!" I said while holding up Dadan's new thong, stretching it so that Ace could see it.

Surprisingly enough, he gave me the same look Dadan gave me before chasing me like a mad killer. Oh crap, should I run too?

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!" I lifted me eyebrow, what was so funny? "Luffy this –hahaha- this is great!-hahahaha- You're-haha-You're a genius!" Ace said between laughs, and I too, started to laugh along my brother for no reason at all.

Then Dadan got mad and hit me on the head. Hard.

And Ace attacked her for hitting me.

In the end, Ace and I slept on the woods, but still, Ace was so cool!

Hmm… What was I talking about? Oh right, Namisaur. After that dream I couldn't see her for two days in fear she would turn to a monster and try to burn me…

"Oi Luffy!"

I turned around to face whoever was talking to me, and saw a grinning Chopper and Usopp. Normally, I would return the smile and play with them, but there was something in that smile that gave me the creeps. "Um… what's up guys?" I said slowly.

They neared at me with heavy footsteps, and I swear everything became slow-motion for a moment, since I saw how Usopp's arm stretched towards me really slowly and I couldn't move an inch.

"Tag! You're it!" He said before both started to run the opposite direction.

Tag? Oh no! I'm it! I started to panic for no reason at all and ran, there had to be someone I could tag! I saw Zoro polishing his swords and, without a second thought (I should really stop doing that and start giving things a second thought by the way) I used my Gomu Gomu no Bazooka and punched Zoro straight in the chest. "Tag! You're it!" I yelled to the flying Zoro that landed on the sea.

Oops…

"Luffy…" A shiver ran down my spine as I saw how a wet, creepy hand, appeared out of nowhere and grabbed the railing of the ship.

Wait, a hand? Where was the rest of its body?

Holy shit! A ghost! Even worst! It's a talking hand! And it knows my name!

"I'm going to kill you!" The creepy hand said in Zoro's voice… Zoro's voice? Suddenly, Zoro appeared on the railing of the ship, _glued_ to that hand. It was Zoro's hand! I gave a sigh of relief after realizing that there were not talking hand zombies in the ship.

You thought I was going to say something about the hand possessing Zoro right? Well there! I'm not _that_ stupid!

…

That didn't sound right…

Lost in my musings, I failed to notice a fuming Zoro walling towards me. He resembled a hungry panther ready to attack his pray.

And when I realized that I was the prey, I started to run as fast as I could. "HAHAHAHAHA! You're slow Zoro!" Just a little bit of teasing to make things more interesting.

"W-Wait! Luffy! Don't come here!" I heard Chopper say as he started to walk backwards, and I would have done what he asked, really, but my psycho swordsman was following me and… WHY THE HELL IS HE TAKING OUT HIS SWORDS?

"Chopper! Run!" I yelled happily as the small reindeer gave a small 'eep!' and started to run. Soon enough we saw Usopp, screaming something that I didn't hear because I was deep in thought of how to lose Zoro. Oh look! Now Usopp's running with us too!

"Is everything alright?" I heard Brook say from behind me, and then a crashing sound followed. Is it safe to turn around and look? Ah, why not?

I did as I thought and couldn't help the big smile that was forming in my face. It seems that Zoro crashed with Brook while chasing us, ending in a cursing Zoro face first on the ground. Thank God for the living skeleton!

"Brook! You're it!" I heard Usopp say as he made a happy dance. I'm guessing his happy that Zoro's not the one following us anymore…

"I'm 'it'? Yohoho~ I don't seem to understand what you're saying Usopp-san!"

"It's easy, you have to touch someone and then try not to be touched again!" Chopper explained to Brook as the skeleton nodded. Zoro, on the other hand, was taking a nap… He's so lazy right?

"Yohoho! Aright, I'll play!" He said and walked inside the kitchen. We stared at the place Brook had entered with a confused look. Didn't he just say he got it?

"_Nami-san, you're it."_

Ah, I see, he's trying to get more people into the game! Brook's so smart!

"_YOU PERVERTED IDIOT!"_

Hmm… I don't think Nami wants to play…

Suddenly a huge crash was heard and we saw how the door broke down to pieces, and out went a flying Brook, crashing into the mast with a loud thud. That was definitely going to let a bruise… Ah! Although Brook has no skin to bruise! Skull joke~!

I think I've hung out with him a little too much…

A fuming Nami appeared out of the smoke the broken door was emitting, or is it dust? Well whatever. She was huffing and her face was a bright red… Oh no! Brook activated Namisaur!

"What's wrong, Nami san?" Sanji said as he ran to Nami's side after hearing her scream. And believe it or not, all that sound didn't wake up Zoro, not even the shattered door that was on top of him.

Nami started to shake in anger and glared at Brook in a way that suddenly made me want to pee… He's so lucky to be unconscious. "He lifted my skirt!" Nami said angrily while her face turned even more red, how's that even possible?

"YOU DAMN BASTARD!" Sanji suddenly yelled startling us all, then with a speed that could rival that of a ninja, he appeared next to Brook and kicked him into the mast repeatedly. If it wasn't for the fact that I was still shaking from Nami's glare of doom, I would've rescued my friend from Sanji's wrath.

"STOP IT BRO!" Franky yelled as he dashed to the deck with inhuman speed. He's gonna save Brook! Such a good friend... "You're going to hurt the ship!" Ah, my bad.

Suddenly Sanji and Franky started to argue with each other, and when Usopp and Chopper went to help Brook, Sanji started to yell at them too.

I frowned. I didn't like the sight of my crew fighting, and I think Robin noticed that, because a hand appeared on my arm and then it touched my chest lightly. I turned around, confusion written all over my face, and she smiled at me. "Tag, you're it." She said calmly with that small smile still on place.

I grinned, Robin was really cool too, and after a few seconds my grin turned into a smirk. Oh yeah, I have a plan.

"Here, Nami-san, let's go get some tea." I heard Robin said.

"Ah Robin! I'm so glad you're here! You're the only sane person in this ship!" Nami answered as they both headed to the kitchen.

Hey! That was mean, we're all sane here… Nah, she's right. Putting that thought aside, I prepared for my super-plan-to-make-my-crew-shut-up-and-play-with-me, SPTMMCSUAPWM for short.

I tip-toed behind the guys without them noticing my presence, I stretched my arm behind me so it could take some speed and took a large breath. "TAG! YOU'RE IT!" I yelled and I let my arm hit Sanji, who hit Franky, and as a bonus, they both landed on top of Zoro.

"Shishishi!" My plan worked, they're now quiet. Now the only problem is to decipher why are Usopp and Chopper giving me that face… It seems like they would faint any moment now.

"LUFFY!" They yelled, Well Zoro and Sanji yelled, because Franky screamed Mugiwara at me, that's how he calls me. "YOU'RE SO DEAD!" They said in unison and for some reason, I had this urge to run for my life.

"RUN LUFFY! RUN!" Usopp yelled before he dashed to the other side of the ship with Chopper close behind.

"WAH! HAHAHAHA!" I screamed, or laughed? I'm not really sure… I only knew I had to run for my life. Man, I'm going to be starving in some minutes…

But at least, it seems like today was not a boring day as I thought.

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I'm still not sure how in-character I managed to make Luffy… I'm hoping for close enough :P

Maybe I'll do a continuation, maybe not, it depends on my mood and you guys! I don't know… tell me what you think.

Any thoughts, typos or suggestions, please make them at 01-555-REVIEW, we'll make sure to do everything humanly possible to satisfy your needs (If our phone is not working, please click the button below).

Hope you liked it!

~nt'kit


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